Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
i can't believe i had my finger in that
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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