By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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