There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Randomize
