How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
