I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
