How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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