Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
