we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
