11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Randomize
