And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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