Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
