Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
