I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
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