awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
