You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
