Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Randomize
