I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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