why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
