call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
