well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
