He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
