Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
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