lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
