This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Randomize
