i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
