yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
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