I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
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