Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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