I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
lol hangovers are for mortals.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
Randomize
