pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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