: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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