i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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