You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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