Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
