Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
