something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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