She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
