I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
The air was thick with penises
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
