Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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