I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
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