Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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