So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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