Can Purell be used as lube?
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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