Why are handjobs necessary in class?
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
