Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
the condom got lost in my hair
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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