i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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