I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
