sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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