why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
