Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Randomize