I want to have your abortion
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
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